Getting a raises feels amazing and hopeful. Long summer vacations end, and aren’t so fun without money.

Anybody that picked long summer vacations over getting a raise must not be lower middle class/balancing above the poverty level. Gimme dat motherfucking raise.

I’ve been a pass traveler, too, but I’ve seen this policy enacted in wildly different ways from site to site (and from agent to agent). If you’re going to have a policy, it shouldn’t be selectively applied, and a company should always be very careful not to criticize the apparel of younger children.

Why is this a thing?

Is that a dress on Lauren though? It looks a lot like a stylized white jumpsuit with an amazeballs cape.

I’m vodka and whatever I have on hand these days.

Seconded! Besides, I’m lazy, and making someone else do most of the work appeals to me.

I voted for missionary then, and I’d do it again now that I’m married. I like the weight on top of me!

I’d still have taken the flannel nightgowns!

Battle of Books Champion 1993-1995.

I can’t believe Getting an A was a 14 seed. You know what kind of people read Jez? Nerds. We didn’t just love getting A’s, we LIVED FOR IT.

Prediction: Going to Bed Hella Early is going to take it all.

I can’t believe all the “basic” criticism she gets. I think she’s fabulous.

Unnecessary meanness. Thanks for your opinion, though.

I know this piece was tongue-in-cheek, but... The “big deal” aspect of this trip is that it’s William’s first official visit to France/Paris since his mother died.

Holy shit this movie..

I don’t care how bad it is, I want it to be the biggest hit ever. They’re already saying it might have a historic opening and I hope it does because One Million Moms (75K actual members last time I checked) and the American Family Association and other assorted bigots have launched a boycott, and I want them…

Not to be confused with The Price of Salt, which is the name of the Patricia Highsmith novel on which the film Carol was based.

This post is satire by humor writer Alexandra Petri

Yea, I’m sure the 10 year olds whose after-school food programs are getting cut will just go down to the coal mines and get a job. Or the elderly shut-ins who depend on Meals on Wheels will just drink the Elixir of Youth they’ve been holding onto and get right back out into the workforce.