It is impossible to satire Trump. Whatever the dumbest, silliest, thing you can think of, he's done dumber and sillier.

You’ll shoot your eye out, kid!

Fun fact: gold has about the same density as tungsten, 19.3 kg/L.

Maybe it’s about how Chelsea murdered Vince Foster and made it look like a suicide, then murdered Seth Rich a couple decades later. Jeffrey Epstein is only the latest Chelsea victim... that we know of. She’s like a little Mathilda who grew up into the Clinton family’s Femme Nikita.

My in-laws are from Iowa City and they had to take me to get a tenderloin sandwich while I visited. Like where the tenderloin is 3x larger than the bun they put it on. But I see that listed under Indiana so maybe that’s just a midwest thing in general, not specifically Iowa.

What the fuck is up with a pb&j for colorado? Go to Kochevar’s in Crested Butte, and get a god damned Appalachian Turkey Melt.

Okay here’s the list. The rest of you can rank it!

Bring back Lanesplitter.

Who would have thought that a program created by this administration wouldn’t really work as the President says?  NOBODY COULD HAVE FORESEEN THIS!!!

Silverado!

This is very helpful, thanks. I deal with hard brown sugar by weighing it. King Arthur tells me that a cup of packed brown sugar weighs about 7.5 oz, so I usually use just a tad less to account for the moisture evaporating off, or 8 oz if the recipe says “firmly packed.”

Most other Rolling Stones songs work as a substitute, but I’d say Honky Tonk Women is the best.

I see polenta as a fancy starch to serve liquidy things on top of. Pasta, rice, cous cous, and mashed potatoes all serve the same general purpose and are probably a little easier in general. Some of those are better than others depending on what you are putting on top - like some grilled sausage with a tomato or…

Polenta is basically thicker grits, isn’t it?  I mean, the exact type of corn meal and the grind might be a little different but they are at the very least close cousins.

Pole vault.

Spot on! People love to talk about how tight knit their communities are and as far as I’m concerned right now is the time to put your money where your mouth is so to speak!

You want to eat a food mascot? Go for Mayor McCheese.

As a cold weather bicyclist (colorado) and backcountry skier, I also use flute breathing to avoid fogging my goggles (I use goggles while cycling in the winter).

Used to ride daily year-round in Seattle while wearing glasses, can confirm. Turns out moving to California works better though.

Let them register their ships stateside and pay taxes and then we’ll look into giving them assistance in a year or two.