I once tripped over my own shoelaces and dropped an entire pizza while also falling on my face in front of the Sunday lunch crowd. And it was a specialty pizza too, because the table it was for were super snotty about their food. Needless to say they were less than pleased but they still tipped me. The woman made me…

It was the Roadhouse on Clove Road, right after the exit from 278. I went to Wagner, so it was basically the only place within walking distance I could work. Your assessment of SI is entirely correct.

I've developed really good reflexes over time. The last time some rando touched me in a bar (grabbed my ass) I caught him as hard as I could in the chest with my elbow and then gave him a very firm talking-to about how humans greet other humans in polite society. The second guy who pulled that shit on you would have…

That is awful! We had a similar policy/the owner thought the customer was always right because he was just as dumb as they were. People suck.

You know, I think that's exactly what I said after he left.

Duuuuuude I would've put the hurt on that guy. And gotten fired. But euuuuugh.

Man, I wish I'd done that the time a dude came in 10 minutes before closing, kept me 40 minutes AFTER closing because he refused to order everything he wanted and instead chose dishes one at a fucking time, and then tried to give me a $3 tip on a nearly $100 bill. My response, when he handed me three bucks, was to…

Bring it. I still have latent Burger Lady rage.

I worked at a small Italian restaurant on Staten Island while I was in college. The owner was terrible, the food was overpriced, and the customers were the worst. The main seating area was separated from the kitchen by a fairly long hallway, and everything was done in tile, so even if you wore super comfortable shoes…