Big Nutbrown Hare sounds like something I got stuck in my teeth while going down on a guy in a club bathroom once.

I haven't laughed that hard all day. Sounds like a line from a Kevin Smith movie.

11. Pleasurable sexual position

Is this just a general statement or did you read something in the author's piece that I must have missed... because I came away with the impression that Tracy didn't so much as hint at that.

How appropriate this guy's name is Gaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!!!!!

Well, this paints a picture of a raging asshole. My guess is that's 100% accurate.

Needed more old fat straight white guys sadly sucking on their limp dicks while crying. In Chargers jerseys.

The Parents Television Council has sand in all five of their sex boxes.

So, uh, could the letter writer do a follow-up. I want to know if and how he got away with it.

Stretch, not stress. Duh

The guy is paid to play football. Talking to the media is bullshit if you don't want to. I'm sure he's seen enough Family Guy episodes to know what atheletes come across like to know to stay clear of the fucking microphones. Fuck Goodell and the need to force players into the hype machine. What matters is what happens…

Question: We're these guys also frat bros?

This seems destined, from the outset, to bring readers to a conclusion that it really never happened. But, by the end, it appears the police, while not having a suspect, do have additional evidence that has never been released.

I've been caught. The conversation went like this the next morning:

Strangely, his name was Dave...

I've never actually had this happen...but I've thought it might have been... Which led me to doing it myself. I'd end up cummimg on my shirt and having to gently roll out of bed, careful to not smear the evidence on the sheets, and change pjs in the bathroom... Well... except for that one time... When my reputation as…

I liked his role in Tusk. I found it rather Peter Sellers-esque.

This might be the gay in me talking, but I'd totally blow him. Nice move.

20? Ball Man.