I am literally crying I am laughing so hard to myself, trying not to wake my three year old daughter up who is sleeping next to me!!! Nice work- beat me to it.

Yes! Good! I did not have a cookie, but I hoped someone had a cookie and would give it to this man!

I think my family absorbs more dark matter particles than that...

Hilti anyone? I am very close to a purchase on a Hilti drill- anyone not like them?

Nice! Driverless cars running all over the place Herbie-style on the Vegas strip!

Yeah... That's not true.

Too soon! Hilarious though.

Have you spent one earned cent on anything other than absolute necessities instead of donating it to the poor? If so you are a hypocrite.

Dude- the building is made of things that aren't edible...

Is she on the toilet at the beginning of the add when she asks "Is that rain?" She doesn't live in an underground bunker and it doesn't look like its that hard to look out the window...

Yeah ok so it was cool?

Did it break? Because, you know, they dropped it...

I see what you did there- penis joke! I like it!

Ok- just laughs my ass off at your comment. It was appropriate to laugh, right?

So he was killed by an improperly filled prescription for medicine?

I dropped my phone and lost it on that one. Thank you sir!

I just laughed out loud. That is exactly what I was thinking- oh yeah- just send a few hundred self propelled mining robots to extract the shit we need from the asteroids. Piece o' cake.

Ahh! I see what you did there! I like! I like!

So- if he thinks music should be free, why isn't he recording music and giving it away for free? Oh! Right! Because he isn't a musician. The musicians- the people who create the music- have a right to decide what to do with their talents and art. If they want to work with labels and give away their rights to…

Sure- but they'll set your cat on fire too!