Say what you will about Burning Man, its existence is entirely justified in perpetuity due to the Malcolm in the Middle episode it inspired

Windham Lawrence Rotunda has died.

Finding Dildo

(Randy Newman singing voice) You’ve got a friend in me. You’ve literally got a friend in me. Now here’s your other friend, and I think we agree. I’m about to have two friends in me!

On the plus side, ten year olds are Allen’s target audience. 

Full penetration.

Welcome to another Taylor Swift Week on the Taylor Swift Club.

I suppose I should be encouraged that they have moved from 1950's messaging to 1980's messaging.

*peeks at article*

You don’t need to have a straight face when you *write* something like that. I can only imagine the writer of those words is still trying to get their eyes to come back down out of their head so that they can see things again.

If you put a name on a product that you have no hand in, just fuck you. It is the absolute lowest celeb bullshit.

I can only assume she was criticizing the dancer for getting taller.

“Tried to put his arm around Gosling’s waist”

So they’re both banging Olivia Wilde is what you’re saying?

Simuliuted?

“for some private reasons,”

Because some genius at Disney thought “Barbie? No one’s going to want to see that!”

Early summer burn off?