I don’t even remember it. All I remember of her at that Oscars was her dress/necklace combo was weird. Which was apparently due to some sort of last minute dress problem?

Your use of the word hoodrat tells me we’re not gonna see eye to eye on this.

Savage.

“See you later savages.”

Epic.

I don’t even know her and I’m scared of Naomi Campbell.

Speak AMERICAN you damn commie

“We thought we’d just send you a little love note. We like you guys.”

in the not particularly gross but fairly embarrassing column: my doctor once told me i had the largest tonsils he’d ever seen, so i went up for a high five.

I hate public bathrooms.

- Tim Burton, basically.