@When_you_get_the_money_you_get...: Some perverted ad rep — I'm looking at Big Daddy Drew, here — should have confused Planter's to adapt this for a campaign. #jeremytyler

Still better than Tamir Goodman. #jeremytyler

@Insert_F_Word: Leitch, good. Daulerio, bad. These pretty little people, reading pretty little Deadspin — at least, at one time — have to keep things simple, or their cocaine-ravaged hearts might give out, finally. #cornellbusinessschool

Brody Dahl: Courtney Love for a new Willenium.

Also: we must put this man in the Hall, steroids be damned. & his plaque must be coloured to match his current tone. #sammysosa

@KnownThenAsDanFouts: It certainly won't go sailing anymore.

Sammy's a Wayans, now? #whitechicks #sammysosa

Ok. What's the one comment you made? #seansalisbury

@HasselbeckDomeWax: "This is T.C.* I have A.J. in the car".

"Tommy, this is Zoe. I just read Barry Petchesky's Phillies Girl post... & it is the most disgusting thing I have ever read in my entire life. I seriously want a call respecting Sarah, & to tell him how fucking disgusting he is. I'm now nauseous & I can't eat lunch. Good-bye". #philliesfan

@OutSportsReader: I'm hit it, my homo friend. In fact, she'd be my fairest lay, prolly. (Has had a run of fatties — true fatties — since May '05... In fact, the only two slender gals, from before that month, were... [trails off].) #philliesfan

@Who's Cartwright?: Is this s'posed to be an either/or, or Sophie's Choice, sort? 'Cause I really would not lose for having to pick one or the other... I mean, I still have refractory periods, even if the sex is more and less than hetero. #womenssoccer

@Sheed's Bald Spot: Now, I'm imagining between taken by Siennas Miller & West, & Tila Tequila. Good times. #basketball

He's actually Jewish. #basketball

@Sheed's Bald Spot: Sienna West. #basketball

@titansfan78: Tommy & Dash are getting fleeced in this exchange. #failgate

@ChanHoParkour: Mr Daulerio had a vested interest in a Goomba winning. #failgate

@J-No: They're gone. Long gone. #failgate

Why is Kareem Abdul-Jabbar attempting to blunt the effort to sock the former USC coach? Has the Dream no pride in his alma mater?

@Phintastic: Broke up? Try: instigated. #timfloyd