With Maradona possibly fired from Argentine National Team — meaning (many) fewer coaching meltdowns of utmost entertainment value, I beseech the Sox to fire Francona — hey, they just lost to Anaheim, in the Division series — & hire Schilling. #curtschilling

@ReelectTilden: Given how much he loves quarterbacks, I wouldn't be surprised if Tirico has had to dodge come in the booth. #stevephillips

@Deadliest Crotch: It's not gay! You're only touching his arm, not his baby-arm. #watercoolerfodder

The Filipino Ron Mexico is, pretty much, all of them. #fights

I prefer the Great Lectures Series catalog that pops up semiannually. Makes me feel smarter. (Same reason I read Deadspin comments.) #poop

@sir_pantsalot: Singed pubes will be all the rage. #poop

Buzz just sent this note to LBJ:

If USA Soccer falls for this big-timing by AC Milan, we should give back our World Cup qualification. Let Costa Rica have it, & propel Uruguay into tournament as well.

@JoeyPorterAle: Touch it. #floridastateseminoles

Sexx Laws? You want to defy 'em! I want to defy 'em, too! #streaking

@DirkToberFest: #1 Call-in to the Sunday AM NFL pre-show with SOCIAL CONSERVATIVE Steve "The Homer" True. Tell Chewy to say hello to his attorney for my [relative redacted]. #highschoolfootball

I got almost as bad for doing 75 in a 55, crossing over from Louisville into Indiana after the Derby in '05. Stupid speed-traps. #louisvillecardinals

@Kid Canada: Coach actually looks like an if they mated for Carl Monday & Mike Cooper. Creepy. #highschoolbasketball

@David Hume: Saw that in Savage Love, too. #1 #jamboroo

@ArkansasFred: Limp Bizkit is the best band to come out of Jax. #jacksonvillejaguars

@HockeyMountain: Then why would Dash have wanted to leave the comfort of Fleshbot? I mean, yes, they can be short on BBW tags, sometimes, but overall... #barackobama

Bjorn Turok says fingers at dawn. #rutgersscarletknights

Lawrence Phillips pulled his feeding tube. #collegefootball

Also absent: the Kentucky Wildcat who sacked Tebow violently, & the Florida lineman into whose knee the Quarter-back fell. Though maybe Amazing Grace Baptist is expecting the two offenders to hang themselves, as Judas hanged himself. #religion

I hope she meets September Carrino.