And that, boys and girls, is how Patricia's inbox got flooded with dickpics.

Haha. I think that star systems close to each other have similar biology so hopefully as you keep moving you’ll find the bouncing dildo of your dreams.

I swear if there is a room with a cake at center of the universe I’m done.

You know what they call alternative medicine that actually works? Medicine.

The answer is obviously to establish a Jedi Temple and conduct services as a religion. You could do worse for a faith.

This video is worth watching just for the way the guy says “pool noodle.”

We get it.. You Vaporeon.

Wait, wait a minute... This marine biologist, is named OCEAN RAMSAY? Come the fuck on!

I loved that movie... I still want a sequel!

I was already a fan of the books, so I was primed to like it. But I felt the ship designs alone earned my ticket price. And I still have the soundtrack in heavy rotation!

They are exactly that type.

We get it. You like Hot Fuzz.

Stop using the word “accident”. There are VERY few car “accidents”.
Collisions are caused by negligence of one sort, or another.

Cool story bro. Nobody cares.

I was playing this shit before your 10 year old was alive, so frankly Pat, I don’t give a damn.

The every-30-years thrill of some asshole getting what he deserves.

“Some Times in Life You Shouldn’t Take the Bull by the Horns"

Alternate headline: “Asshole Dies For Doing Asshole Things.”

Of course, to her phone, it just looked like this.