Craig Melvin is a brother without a mustache but he was about to pick the phone and call the fam in the ‘sip.

Apparently being a (1) Black (2) journalist is enough to incense a Bubba so greatly, on sight alone, that it cannot resist pulling off the road immediately and attacking.

Poor dumbfuck Wallace doesn’t even realize that “report it accurately” isn’t going to result in the report he wants.

To say nothing of the fact that none of what Brewster was reporting on had anything to do with whichever RWNJ-fervent-belief-conflated-with-actual-fact was on the hamster wheel in Wally’s head.

I like how Craig Melvin got his Pop voice on like he was about to take off his belt, “Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey”. LOL

SMART goals were not designed for home use. They were designed for companies, by HR, to limit liability of people having lawsuits against the company by having two people with vague goals, and sueing because someone didn’t get a promotion.

I would love to see a narrated animation of this crime.  Like Archer style.  How stupid you gotta be?

I need her to break that old bitch down like a fraction

Yeah I know we were never getting a sequel to Man From UNCLE either way, but the Armie Hammer news pretty much is the final nail I guess. Makes me sad, I loved the hell out of that movie.

I hope he’s not a secret cannibal like his co-star in that spy movie that was surprisingly solid yet quickly forgotten forever ago.

Alice really can’t catch a break though with the lead star of her new show being a Whedon regular who was defending him against Ray Fisher riiiiiight up until his Buffy co-stars came out and then he got kinda quiet.

“I respect Kerrion. I’m not Kerrion’s equal though. I’m not his equal. I’m his dad. And when you talk to me, especially about things that you say that you want from me, I can’t hear you when you are extremely aggressive when we’re communicating.”

The wildness of telling someone else that they weren’t abandoned.

Since she was on the showcase she likely won at least 2 prizes before that so I give zero shits for her. All my shits go to the people who get to “Come On Down” and just get stuck there.

No, they’re just literally following the directions on the bottle... “mix thoroughly... before pouring into douche bag”

My first thought was My Name is Earl (or Mallrats) Jason Lee?

Yeah, George thinks his wife’s boss is crazy...

I think you’re right about everything except this particular interview. Because in this particular interview, we’re all laughing at this stupid motherfucker for trying to cry his way outta this shit. And applauding Gayle for not giving him any applause for his acting performance.

Satan: “Goddamn, y’all makin’ it too hot even for me!”

There is not a single man or woman amongst this administration whose hand isn’t 1.) out waiting for someone to drop something into it or 2.) grabbing the pussy.

‘Shirley wouldn’t like being called a “jazz musician.”’