If you spend too much time Stalin against Russia, they will go ahead and take the ball for an easy Putin.

I used to be the one with the much higher sex drive and doing the initiation, but it became quite apparent after a few years that she is pretty much only interested in receiving and not giving. So, after a long time of the stale old routine, I simply stopped initiating. She noticed and started to initiate, which at…

I keep putting it on my calendar, but no one else ever shows up.

My calendar is wide open, unlike my wife.

Just the tip?

I wonder who designed them...

If he’d withdrawn earlier, this conflict wouldn’t even exist.

Was one of your moves the garlic knot?

“Sentient Breadstick” was my old stripper name.

Saw this earlier and all I could think was that it looks like a sentient breadstick.

A Canadian triangle is actually a sexual euphemism. Its a threesome that involves Poutine, flannel, and a whole lotta Gordon Lightfoot music.