My favorite line in the Vanity Fair article:

since he cant sell burgers at his restaurant and can’t sell his steaks at sharper image, he has to take his beef to twitter.

“International Federation of Bodybuilding president Rafael Santonja”

“I’m also taking this action for the benefit of all parents and families, who may be facing the same violation of their rights—”

It’s that look... like when you squeeze out a fart, but maybe shit yourself.

I pray for Trump to step on a single Lego every Friday night.

Black president

There are so many “toss-up” states going by recent polling that it’s terrifying enough. There’s a very good chance that Hillary wins but doesn’t get past 300, which would be the closest election since 2004.

Nah, Trump sensed a draft come into the room, so he was dodging it.

Conservatism: Pushing back against objective reality since St Ronald of Reagan descended from capitalist heaven in the year of our lord, nineteen hundred and eighty.

From my coworker Jordan Sargent:

When i was just an innocent 12 year old mormon kid, my neighbor friends asked me if i had ever masturbated before, i said no not knowing what it was.

They explained that i just needed to get some soap for lubrication and rub my dick.

What they didn’t emphasize was they were talking about liquid soap or lotion. So that…

So, wait a second, Trump and his supporters hate the whole “politically correct” thing, right? But kids need to be nicer to each other on the internet? So at what point does the “being nicer” kid have to be shut off to become the Trump-supporting, non-PC, “telling it like it is” adult?

What a shame. This pair would have given us so many quality memes.

It gets really old when white women don’t understand or attempt to understand the meaning of certain songs written by people of color, or even any piece of clothing or accessories from other cultures like headdresses and bindis, yet they still claim they’re doing “respectful tributes” when they use them just for fun…