I’d love it a lot more if I though it would appeal to the average undecided voter in Colorado and Pennsylvania.

Counterpoint: Yes he did!

This was so damned exhausting. Everything that bloviating eggsac of rotten carrot mash said filled me with a white hot scorn. He is backpfiefengesicht incarnate. At one point I shouted “you motherfucker” so loudly I think my windows vibrated. The fact that he is still considered a valid presidential candidate makes me…

There, there. It’s going to bs okay, punkin’.

“If we’re going to do this, we gotta do it now! No one will remember it because they’ll be focused on that other split! We’ll have some privacy with this! Move move move!”

Dragons are assholes. One of them stole the arkenstone from me and another killed my friend Beowulf over a stupid goblet.

Who’s more sensitive, someone who experiences emotional distress at discussions of sexual assault, or someone who experiences emotional distress over a sign warning people who might feel emotional distress at discussions of sexual assault?

it’s the 2016 version of the here there be dragons warning on the edge of a map.

Except she doesn’t really have any raisins. The only public official who tells fewer lies than her is Obama. We have all read, what, a decade of her email and we have nothing to show for it. She was a fucking girl scout. Trump’s muffin is one big fucking raisin. I think we can be pretty confident what he will do if we…

Pro tip: Any time you start a post with “I have nothing against [historically marginalized demographic]”, people are going to assume you do have something against them.

Because that doesn’t matter? Are you fucking serious?

Disagree. Trump just outright claimed Palestinians must accept a full defeat while Clinton had challenged at least some of Israel’s ongoing expansion and egregious activities. She is not a progressive like Bernie but she is also not pushing even further to the right like Trump. I don’t agree with much of her…

It’s not that he knows nothing. He just lives in a post-factual world.

Mental gymnastics. My body may be Sookie St James, but my mind is Simone Biles.

How have you managed to remain so optimistic that you still think there’s a possability we might be capable of critical thinking at some point? What’s your secret? Is it Xanax? It’s Xanax, right?

Drumpf must have the good folks over at FIFA working for him now.

The capitol is Betlehem, right? Because that’s where baby Jesus lives.

Only if we’re lucky.

He’s raised Canada’s profile on the world stage in the short time he’s been PM than Harper did during his 300 year term (that’s what it felt like). Go take a nap, you’re cranky.

He has been ‘getting to work’ since day one, guess what ‘photo ops’ go with the job, they happen, get over it. It takes a lot of glad-handing to undo the damage that was done by the last guy.