Her boca is anything but junior.

To add insult to injury, casino security reported that Woolley "lost by half a length."

On this writing assignment, Doris's 4th grade teacher at PS 83 gave her a "Fuckin' A."

And if the child was born out of wedlock, the Giants will credit the father with a blown save.

The Chilean team calls that move the "Genital Pinchochet."

"Woman like money!"

Hey AJ, here's a spoiler alert: everyone dies.

ESPN movie casting comedy pyramid, please.

drinking eight Slurpees a day and eating an In-N-Out burger whenever I could

Surprisingly, the rabbit still gets fisted less than Suzyn Waldman.

Padre, or no Padre. He is no Ray.

+1

+1

supposed to implicate that we randomly fuck others while in a relationship

Yeah. How much you wanna bet that Matt's hobbies include re-creating scenes from the Pottery Barn catalog?

That Glenn Davis is not trying to be Glenn Davis, but instead Bill Cosby.

After Big Baby's long response to her simple question, the middle-aged Waffle House waitress just sighed, and then yelled "smothered, covered, capped and chunked!" to the kitchen.

Phoenix native here, and even though you're attending ASU I'd be happy to help. You can reach me at clueheywood@gmail.com

Go to the reflecting pool in front of the Lincoln Memorial and look for a half drunk guy wearing a Buzzsaw shirt. Then I'll reveal the first name of one of the ninjas.

Formerly two ninjas. One is now MBA by directive of the kommissar as a propaganda campaign to shore up commenting (and in turn, pageviews) post-redesign. The other is still the ninja.