Ill just say I've broken bones, had surgeries, probably have had undiagnosed concussions... The gout flare ups have been far and away the worst pain I've experienced in my life and it's not even remotely close. 

I am SO GODDAMN OUTRAGED that I basically agree with most of this and don’t have a chance to write a sarcastic spittle-flecked list of all my problems with it.

My Mango is King Kong Bundy in cat form.

It looked like his knee traveled.

“Established in Chicago in 1898 as an amateur football team”, a status they have worked hard to maintain since. 

Still hoping that curly mess of hair comes down to his belly when the Twins retire his No. 64 at Target Field in 2035.

he’s so fucking cool

If they were true Minnesotans they’d be ok with the kid in the Packers hat so long as he wore it for 16 years followed by a Jets hat and ending up in a Vikings hat for 1 glory year and then a very, very sad year.

Yeah but if he REALLY came from Minnesota, he would be wearing shorts and a jacket.

Ben Simmons almost turned him into Joel Embid.

Every character on Bebop is a question of what race/ethnicity should be cast.

Back in the day, pinball machines used to have very low point values. The most points you’d see on a pinball machine backboard was in the thousands, often having only 4 digits with which to record scores.

I used to work for Faegre Baker Daniels and this lady forced us to change her name back to Bono after she was remarried. She’s living off of her husband’s name and she was a pain in the ass to deal with.

The other day I saw gravity at Barnes & Noble looking for a book on Simone Biles.

I’m on team “Pat Riley” now. Thibs is a motherfucker.

More like the free agency you lost when you already demanded a big trade. Who would’ve thought nine figures?

So it was like good advice that he just didn’t take?

Can’t wait to read about this in the Boston Two-Dimensional Disc Globe

You wanna talk about “deep cuts” from Michael Moorcock? Allow me to share one of my favorites (though not really in the same category as the examples you made). This is from over 20 years ago, so forgive me that I’m fuzzy on some of the details.

Fits the description the New Orleans newspaper had as well...