As if his hands could wrap all the way around a baby’s neck.

I accepted my $20 prize for first place in the “Best Pro Life Poster” contest at my Catholic high school.

I’m pretty embarrassed to admit this, but I was once anti-choice. I was a born-again christian asshole. I spoke at a dinner, there’s video of me at the age of 19 on a christian talk show, marched at an anti-choice event. I do my penance now by giving money every month to Planned Parenthood and having an abortion every…

Started a petition in sixth grade to tell the hot lunch ladies to dial back the frequency of the squalid mashed potatoes. Didn’t work and the ladies were pissed.

Sarandon’s self-perception of her own ethical purity trumps, in a very real and pun intended way, the physical and emotional safety of millions of other people.

It’s only fair because every time a guy votes for another dude we always say he’s just voting with his dick!!

I think Sarandon is voting with her brain. Too bad her brain is petty and entitled.

Susan also doesn’t vote with her brain.

Wasn’t a fan when Killer Mike said it, not a fan if it now. Vote for Stein, vote for Clinton or ... other choices, it’s fine. But don’t imply that people voting differently than you are voting irrationally or because they’re being driven by things that aren’t their brains.

and like no mustard, no veg, not even any avocado, no goddamn iceberg lettuce? that is the fucking sorriest sandwich ever

DAMN this motherfucker is even more vanilla than I imagined. Ugh

scott walker’s twitter, two years later:

For 26 years, I’ve eaten 2 ham & cheese sandwiches nearly everyday

Between this and the Daveed Diggs video today, I’m feeling very targeted by the media. I’M ALREADY VOTING FOR HER MEDIA AND I HAVE DONE TONS OF VOLUNTEERING AND DONATED MONEY TOOOOOOOO

“I’ve very excited about because I fucking love Domino’s”

From the sound of it, and to provide a glimmer of hope, I’d bet you anything that if she brought Subway to court she’d get a settlement because Subway really doesn’t want to go to court.

Stories like this are just so tragic, and depressingly common. People are so capable of hiding things that when loved ones find out the truth it’s devastating. Like, maybe they knew that their spouse had a bit of a problem turning off the internet at night before bed, but who would presume that that was because they…

“Donald wasn’t really interested in the children until he could talk business with them”

Do I believe they called him “Diaper Don?”