I always feel bad when I see white people with bad wigs. It just hurts my heart. Stop fucking with those flatbush ave specials. and you know you can't wear that indian remy or the korean hair, that shit looks crazy on your head. You have to find that stuff that comes out of the ukraine. Also lace or nothing white…

It looks like James Taylor showered the people he loved with love. And drugs. And booze.

I'd like to take this opportunity to offer my couch-psychiatry diagnosis that Michael Jackson wasn't a pedophile. He was just a fucking weirdo obsessed with re-creating a happy childhood that he never had. Maybe his relationships with children were not healthy (in that he didn't understand his proper role as an…

...or even charged, for that matter.

You know Woody Allen didn't actually cast or shoot any of the scenes in "What's Up, Tiger Lily?," right? (It was a comedy overdub of an existing Japanese movie.)

Yeah. I'm not going to assume that any individual commenter who doesn't like Woody Allen is biased by his personal life, but people on Jezebel - as a group - definitely have trouble acknowledging that awful people can also be talented. Woody Allen is an evil child molester who should spend the rest of his life rotting…

nope but I've never had a MOC send me a first message of "I want to cum on your face."

"You're too kind."

—Michael Gira

What a glorious haiku.

He said "toque". That is a dead Canadian giveaway. He might as well have said "Wears bunnyhugs" or "Pays the hydro bill in person".

John Lennon was without a doubt a Bono-level douche. But this guy outdouches both of them.

The fact that that totally blah-looking plain black purse costs 6 months of my tuition is just further proof to me that fashion is bullshit.

It's tacky and offensive that there is a bag that costs more than what a large number of Americans make in a year.

Here is a hockey blog post unlike any hockey blog post you've ever read.

This happened to me when I woke up on New Years Day with a blinding migraine. I tried to call out from my opening shift, and my boss told me it wasn't her fault I was hung over, and to come in. I don't even drink! The timing was just really terrible.

Some do!

It is my second-favorite headline I've ever written, after: