Presented By Viacom™!

How does a sports metaphor worn out by generations of dimwitted and unscrupulous men become “cute and clever” when retreaded for women in 2017?

Nobody who was there would call it a “VCR player.” Son.

He can’t help it that his eyes point in different directions.

Lonzo turned down $10m from Nike over (I believe) 5 years. The play here has to be that he lights it up in his rookie season, attracts as much attention as possible to which shoes he’s wearing, then signs to Nike next summer for something like twice that annual rate.

LeBron’s Instagram about this got me thinking. Let’s say Lonzo is everything they say he is: brings the Lakers to respectability and wins ROY. Does Nike come back to the negotiating table (with Lavar stuffed in a closet somewhere) and make another offer next summer?

That, my friend, must have been one risky Google search.

Also because, if the Knicks were somehow visualized as a human face, it’d look exactly like Noah’s.

When the young cocks are ready to shine, you really have to tighten your grip.

‘Tics Take the Town, LeBron Leaves ‘Liers for ‘Kers!?

literally shit on everyone

If I found myself having a similar thought process to a mass shooter (that is, as you appear to be saying here, that political differences justify or excuse violence) I’d engage in some serious reflection.

“I’m starting to see your point.”

Apparently John Clayton was just too good at remaining on camera for ESPN’s liking. This guy. This guy is the future.

I’m terrified the Lakers overthink this and take him at 2. Nothing cures off-the-court issues in Lawrence, Kansas like a move to Hollywood and several million dollars.

When I go to an ice rink, I humiliate myself over multiple skates.

I’d agree with you more wholeheartedly if the Warriors themselves hadn’t lodged similar complaints about their feewings this season (for example, the lack of a video tribute for Durant in OKC.)

Plot twist: current NBA ref holds press conference, announces “I am the first female NBA referee.”

Has Kevin Johnson supplanted Lane Kiffin as the King of Failing Upward?

How does Snyder not even see how harmful it is *to him* to be known league-wide as someone who’d destroy a man’s name for his own expediency?