“requested a security escort when leaving the course because he claimed Middlemo had threatened to wait for him in the parking lot.”

Lets do it scientifically like the Braves and put the stadium where the fans are.

[Shady] C’mon girl, just the tip.

“We’re here. Let’s party!”

Or Winnipeg.

(Wait a second...)

Instead, it will look like Ladies Night at the Cheesecake Factory.

Has Bruce Jenner RSVP’d yet?

21+ a must! I ain’t no Robert Kelly!

This is cool, but if you pay attention to the subtext here, it looks like he’s just trying to get laid

oh, you poor thing. Come to WI. My local liquor store has it for $15 for a 30-pack (or cube for you n00bs) and hell, even my grocery store has it for $16 a cube.

I could not be more on board this assessment. I love high life. As a thank you, I’ve created this masterpiece.

Madeleine Davies, Spokesmodel.

:(

This was my 2006-2008 nostalgia cropping up, only to be shouted down by a muffled scream from my Phillies fan coworker with his head in the oven.

Sources said that Papelbon is rather depressed about the situation. After the last meeting with Amaro Jr., he got himself a cinnabon. Then he was seen at a bar drinking some bourbon and according to one source, he asked the guy he was talking to at the bar about how to acquire chlorofluorocarbon. That other guy was…

Knowing the Indians, I’m guessing they’re depending more on sheer quantity than per unit profit.

They couldn’t even find a proper skyline to put on the fucking team’s draft hats this year. That’s the Miami skyline. That is just the saddest thing. I give up.

Yes, but basketball season starts six weeks later, so you only have to pretend to care for a month and a half before you can jump on the Cavs bandwagon, and no one would blame you, honestly.

I feel a combination of dread, self-loathing, and a desire to grab the nearest alcoholic beverage to me. Football season is coming...

To be fair, Tony Grossi is actually a bigger joke to the sports media world than the Browns are to the NFL, which really tells you something about the guy.