That’s a relief. I thought I might have to sell some of my food stamps so I could get a case for my iPhone. #ThingsThatPeopleDo lol

Sex is easier and more fun with a significant height difference. You are able to get into more positions. The only downside is possibly a shallow vagina. This article should be how an 11 inch height difference makes sex awesome.

I want to know why the guy in front of him stopped.

This exists solely in someones mind who thought it up while they were high. I want to build a car that runs on farts that go directly from my butt to the engine. Can I patent that? Looks like I should be able to.

Slave #213 has died of dysentery

The absurdity of this is what makes it funny. It’s as if a group of people brainstormed bad ideas for games, someone said “slave tetris” and they made it.

Nice house! Bet it was full of arsenic wallpaper. Bummer.

True but then you would never get to experience the thrill of being shaken down by your ex in court.

I totally get some of this stuff understand some women need a little finessing, but for fuck sake, I have things to do. And after you start getting rejected, it’s like okay should I even bother trying cause she’ll probably say no. On top of all that, if you’re a guy and constantly fawn over her for sex and do what she…

If everyone had an electric car, noise pollution would be less. I’m going to make a solar/battery/wind powered vehicle. And by wind I mean I’m putting a sail on it. Yes, that means highway pirates.

“So fucking bright out here”

Shit imagine if we did that and spent 600 billion on something else. We could pay off that debt and start giving the poorest 80 million $7500. Or build the best schools in the world.

It would literally be to the left, right , and above.

Nothing compared to my 17 pounder.

I find the existence of nothing green to be quite depressing.

Nobody is even trying anymore.

The closest thing I can think of is a KVM switch. You can’t do a side by side but you can easily switch between computers without having separate peripherals.

Oh those poor Christians being persecuted. Nobody will let them teach creation in school or let them freely discriminate against people. Christians are free to believe whatever they want and I’m free to make fun of them for it, which is me persecuting them.