• Waffle an Uncrustable

Mandatory

This is fascinating to me because I didn’t even notice a sound!

Also, if you have a collection of the plastic holders for pre-pandemic face-to-face conference badges still hanging around your home a year later, feel free to address your hoarding issue at the same time.

The pieces of browned fat from a steak are only exceeded in goodness by the pieces of browned fat from a pork chop.

Well, you would still.. but your meals would be found more in the parking lot of Safeway rather than inside the store. *grin*.

Ah, a wonderful edition to South Beach stories. Also on the level of two random hookers beating the crap out of a mayor’s wife outside the W because they thought she was a rival prostitute, and the Sun Gym gang robbing and murdering. 
Bravo, Gillum, Bravo! 

And every hotel room comes pre-stocked with someone on the edge of ODing.

Crystal is a customary wedding present in Florida.

*Paging the ghost of Marion Barry*

The head of the CDC basically has to be shamed into doing the most basic humanitarian thing during a crisis.  This is our reality in 2020

You realize this is a question that EVERY person with a budget has to answer.. and its really quite simple.

Don’t people usually get fired on Fridays anyway?  I’d be shocked if he still had his job by EOD

Ah yes, the old “do more work so it looks like you’re working” trick. Works every time.

Have you considered just not being a boot-licking buzzkill?

sorry, boss. getting back to work now

He doesn’t really need to try to get executed; he’s a Black man who killed white people, the death penalty is practically a foregone conclusion.

me too! i mean, polite bows are all fine, but we might as well do something that makes us laugh and smile.

There are valid situations.

I thought about toilet paper too, but....yeah I'm not going to go there. :D