You misspelled Munchkin.

Okay, then! These guys are here!

See, I find "we're all gonna die" to be kind of uplifting and joyful at some point. I.e., we're in this together, let's do our best.

Hint: Wear that outfit when you go out hiking. The grizzly bears will avoid you.

Jesus, man. He disagreed with you in a mildly sarcastic fashion.

On April 1 this year, Tom Magliozzi is once again pretending to be alive—fooled you!!

And then your goddam eight-year-old nephew will prank you all day Saturday.

What if you are a pirate and they recognize you as a regular customer? Do you get anything free?

Fuck April Fool's Day. Fuck pranks 'n shenanigans. Fuck all y'all for preying on my innocence.

1. Eat four KK doughnuts.
2. Drink quart of milk.
3. Repeat as needed.

If you're in the store, everyone else there is either a cop or a junkie. Krispy Kreme is the peaceable kingdom.

I have Harris Teeter and Piggly Wiggly shopper cards in the wallet I take on vacation on the SC coast. (Also BiLo, Food Lion, and Ingle's for the trip down.)

I live in Kentucky. If there's any way to make meth out of orange juice, we'll figure it out.

http://i.gettysburgdaily.co…

AS he should.

That is needlessly cruel, and my cats end up looking like waffles.

I spend five minutes every morning googling how to repair the problem my cats have caused by sitting on my laptop. ("Upside down screen and backwards keyboard.")

If they were small enough, they could live in it.

That are too stage!!

You're "flippantly mean-spirited" and he's the rude one?