It's no wonder you feel that way, accustomed as you are to scrambling your eggs in a mixing bowl like you're making a birthday cake.

Over easy? I thought that was just a linguistic necessity. To suggest that eggs "over easy" are superior to scrambled eggs is unconscionable.

If you beat your eggs in a bowl in my kitchen, you'd better be making a goddamn omelette. In polite society, you scramble eggs over a fire, not a countertop.

Groups A, C, F and H are downright laughable. E should be interesting.

Oh, good, some of the tickets we bid are USA v. Germany. Do we go to the game and watch us get shellacked, or sell them to a bunch of Germans and bathe in champagne in some seedy Recife club?

Close, but this one wins on the pure Fuck-You-itude of it. Kasami saw that he maybe had the keeper beat - there is no earthly reason Suarez should have thought the same here but for his ludicrous talent.

1, 2. Fair enough.

At least Blackmore wasn't in the room at the time - Moyes had to go through his initiation with SAF breathing over his shoulder.

I'm all for equal opportunity insults, I just couldn't believe that someone would begin a critique of an essay (i.e. the linked article) that argues Black Friday is especially criticized by certain leftists for its advancement of mindless consumerism - while the Super Bowl, etc., is not - because of latent misogyny,…

This is a lazy summary. The 80% of the article you write off as "pseudo-academic writing," etc., is the article's crux: an explanation for why critiques of Black Friday are fashionable but critiques of the Super Bowl are less so. The author posits, not unreasonably, that it is because privileged (white, male) critics…

She is fucking stupid.

Who eats ham on Thanksgiving? Is this post a #falseflag sponsored by pig farmers of America?

Yes, but only because it's not what he would want.

Voted no - not because it isn't hilarious or exceptional, but because it's derivative of another nominee. This tweet is most appropriately considered as part of the general Lenny Kekua saga and not as a discrete event.

Do you mean things like "Arsenal are" or "Arsenal have," etc? I don't entirely agree - just read any piece on the Heat or the Avalanche or the Wild, etc.

I actually like what he writes, for the most part - I think reasonable people can disagree on something like that. I'm also happy that Deadspin has written so much about soccer, I just wish there was a little more variety in the coverage.

I've been an Arsenal supporter since I started following footy over a decade ago and even I think Greg writes too much about Arsenal.

You're still drunk?

65,000,000. Jurassic Park, Lawyer

Albert's posts are "recipes" the way Ulysses is a tourist's guide to Dublin. Although his gatorade and pizza choices are suspect, his prose is rapturous and if you don't think so, then good day, sir.