I told my dad a JFK joke and he got all, "you know he was shot in the head while his family watched?" Too soon on JFK? He didn't even like my McKinley joke.

Bruno Mars' terrible song "Grenade" just got a new line.

Ouch.

My head hurts now.

I know what to expect from the receiver corps.

It's not my cup of tea but she is really talented. Plus I want to have sex with her. Just sayin.

Yeah I know. The starting pitcher started crying when he have up a lead off walk to start the fifth. The coach seemed like a jag so that's probably the reason.

I'm going to stick with my prognostication that I made to my friends who are Rams fans. They will have a kick ass defense but struggle to score any points. Sam Bradford tearing his knee was part of my prediction.

Have fun with that defensive line, because, well, you know, that's all your team seems to draft. But I'm sure Austin isn't as big of a bust as he seems. Though Kellen Clemens isn't there to throw the ball anymore.

If you are a Rams fan you must hate yourself as much as you hate me s'okay.

I hope they can make it work. Only after that can we approved become good moderators instead of glorified commentators.

Why do you want to eat butthole?

We need Jezebel to step on their nuts to get this shit done again.

You totally should hate yourself. I'm a 25 year old man who lives with his parents drinking Bud Light aluminum bottles watching the Simpsons marathon. I AM LIVING LIFE TO THE FULLEST!

I know, they said that we would be able to to approve comments through recommendation by early this week. Has not happened yet.

Hey, your just an adult who hates himself enough to watch the VMAs . No need to degrade 15 year old girls.

What countries are we talking about? NATO? Everywhere that doesn't have a majority Muslim population? So we should just stop freedom of religion and that will stop sectarian violence thousands of miles away? And we just need to make good Muslims take care of every terrorist everywhere and it will all be good? Am…

I've done too many +ones in order to get a good comment out of the shitter that it has lost meaning to me.

Okay, you asked why you can't use we when talking about a football team and I said because there is no we. If you can't understand that then your being obtuse in order to feel good about an internet argument.

God damn, I wish I didn't finally have something to do this week.