Look at his face. He's a walking birth defect. Can we say fetal alcohol syndrome, people?

Hobos?

LSU = FAS

No, he's 40.

He forgot his fedora.

If you want her to follow you in real life, just leave a trail of cupcakes behind you.

Don't blow his mind. He's a professional athlete.

+1 thaler.

Sepp Blatter is going to eat that guy's children.

There's something fishy going on here, indeed.

SMH.

We were all pretty aware of that hole anyway.

-Was anyone hurt?

Maybe he should be required to wear a helmet all time.

"Hold me..."

She knocked that switch off the ugly tree while she hit all the branches during her fall.

She knocked that switch of the ugly tree while she hit all the branches during her fall.

You do realize that the phrase that you're alluding to is actually a metaphor? (Unless Burneko is working on a really out-there recipe.)

What if I get all roided up and punch my girlfriend's two fighting dogs through a door?

You know if you look that interview video, Goodell is so redfaced, that its clear, even though he's a ginger, that he's been drinking really heavily.