Cool-I didn't know spambots could upvote their own posts.

"We hear they ain’t nothing to fuck with."

And don't forget the line about "a colored lady raised me." That's a classic.

"I'm not racist, but…"

Yes, Donald Trump just reeks of sincerity. REEKS.

Could I request "If I Had a Hammer" for your next number?

Bard Simpson?

I like that! But does it annoy the thrustee?

"Five is right out!"
https://www.youtube.com/wat…

"This morning I looked in the fridge for the laundry detergent."

"It's always in the last place you looked!"
That's because you stop looking when you find it. If you found it and looked in one more place, it would have been in the second to last place you looked. Or the penultimate place.

Sounds like a pickup line. "Hey baby, hold my avocado."

I named mine "Spike."

1…2…3…4

"Balls with relish," heh…

As long as they're not a bunch of stiffs.

Who's a good boy? Who's a good boy?

And yet he's still a right wing icon.

It's a good joke. I hope you're not pissed about it.

"These guys have the right idea-they're wearing their brown pants." (Deadpool)