I think we should probably just get rid of the local gentry.

Where does the Nets pick have to end up before we can definitively say that Danny Ainge fleeced Cleveland?

This game was indeed fun as hell. I’d love to see this Finals matchup.

he’s paralyzed by the mind-shattering force of moses’ bucket

It’s his tribute to Moses Malone:

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Sounds pretty good to me. Can’t be any worse than our current system of handing billions of dollars to already-rich failsons.

It would be pretty neat if all sports teams were just straight up expropriated from their ownners, together with the absurd fortunes those owners have collected by virtue of sitting on a share in an anti-trust-exempt league.

if there’s one thing we know about the nfl it’s that it just can’t stop bending over backwards for a team everyone, including the commissioner, hates, for... reasons

it’s definitely true, bill has voodoo dolls of every referee

it’s going to be brady’s 8th superbowl, and his third of the second half of his career and 8 x 3 is 24... dum dum dum

hail satan

Truly baffling series of offensive posessions by the Warriors in the last 6 minutes of the 4th. A whole bunch of unnecessary, unforced turnovers and terrible shot selection. Kicking out to an ice-cold Klay rather than passing to Durant for an uncontested layup seems particularly egregious to me.

Yeah, he’s kind of a plus/minus enigma. I’m not sure I buy the “more bricks is better,” theory; I think it’s more that he’s just a solid ball handler and excellent facilitator, so the offense flows better when he’s on the floor even though he himself can’t shoot.

You’re not wrong, but I think it’s fine for him to take like open corner 3s or something. Walking up the court and then chucking a contested jumper early in the shot clock is a lot worse.

They can’t stop anyone. They would have lost that game in Boston if the Celtics hadn’t for some reason let Marcus Smart launch a bunch of fantastically ill-advised shots down the stretch.

is elfrid payton the stegosaurus of the nba

That might be his game but I’ve never heard anything negative about him personally. Plenty of guys like that in the league.

That was quick thinking of Bjelica to get his head out of the way, because that was a punch that was meant to do damage if it connected. Also, if you asked me which NBA player would be most likely to get down to fisticuffs on the court, I definitely would not have picked Afflalo, who seems like a pretty chill guy.

He, meaning Jonas in the first sentence.