Far be it for me to try and get inside Trump’s head (because... My god, can you imagine) but like, he doesn’t REALLY want to be president, right? I don’t understand why we’re all entertaining this as though it's sincere.

Seriously. South Florida is fucking bonkers.

You guys, if this fucktard becomes President, we will be bombed twice a week. He is so offensive to everyone. We will be in a perpetual state of war.

It sounded more like a “go back to Africa” type comment before I knew. I’m still offended, though, so it's cool.

If there’s one thing we know about Trump, it’s that he’s a stickler when it comes to manners and decorum...

Trump’s thin-skinnedness is probably his biggest weakness as a politician. His horrific beliefs aren’t bad, his insubstantial policy objectives aren’t a problem, but the fact that he can’t laugh off or dismiss even the gentlest criticism is going to be deadly for him. He’s not always going to be in a position where he…

No. 65% view him unfavorably, 14% favorably; thus -51% net. But yeah, I can only imagine who those 14% are.

No, that’s the split. The difference between favorable and unfavorable. That means ~75% disapprove and ~25% approve.

Trump later said that it wasn’t his decision to remove Ramos — he was kicked out because he started speaking without being called on.

I’m sure he’ll run white house press conferences the same. His press secretary will also have to be a bouncer.

Trump is like a cloud that rains golden shower

So much for that huge segment of the voting population. (Although he probably wasn’t going to get it anyway)

Team snooki indeed. Her husband didn’t go around preaching intolerance in the name of god. Snooki was in Jersey shore did we forget?

Please tell me any reason why I shouldn’t adore Lisa and Zoë. Otherwise, I will love them forever because all I see is awesome and cool.

I suppose this is why I buy nail polish at the drug store and not this internet artisan nail paint nonsense. Aside from laziness.

““Coco Chanel stated that ‘I do not care what they think about me. I do not think of them at all.’ I believe that my perspective is that I do not have time to think about the hateful posters.”

Lawd. Those nails belong in American Horror Story.

I’m gonna lean toward him actually saying something privately to his sister about his feelings on the molestation. From what’s posted above, he doesn’t seem like the type to bite his tongue. So for all we know, he has been telling her the same thing from jump but with this latest scandal, he decided to go public when…

I think it’s time for me to make another donation to Planned Parenthood, but I can’t decide if I should do it in honor of Anna Duggar’s Brother, Closeted Bradley Cooper, or Mel Gibson’s Cunt Mouth.

“I don’t like the concept of monogamy, but I DO like letting my wife believe I do so she’ll be home with a hot dinner waiting for me at night, keeping the house clean and parenting my children so I have plenty of time and mental space to obsess about what else I deserve out of life.”