“...if anyone was offended...”

What are the odds on “Ambien bender?”

That’s a hell of a way to apply for a job at Fox News. 

Place your bets:
“I have black friends.” - 1/2
“I was hacked.” - 1/2
“I’m being silenced/targeted by the liberal media.” - 4/5
“I’m a young, dumb kid and didn’t really mean those things.” - 3/1
“I was kidding.” / “It was satire.” - 4/1
“I’m being quoted out of context.” - 5/1
“I was drunk.” - 7/1
“Fuck yeah, I’m racist. White…

She posted this shit using an Instagram account with her name and picture front and centre? Behold, the master race. 

I get it. You’re just going along, minding your own business and then, boom, you listen to some news and you’re racist. 

I feel like you’re selling Brady short. There’s certainly no shortage of Crossfit chuds and GNC assholes who would be all over this shit.

Are you implying Uggs can’t be leveraged?

Huh, you’re doing lots of stuff with ESPN all of a sudden, which is strange for someone that allegedly hates the media (if ESPN is still “the media”). Does this mean you’re signing in NYC next year?

I’m not talking to you, media!

We’re in an interview, KD, yes you are.

<headphones on ears>

Imagine fucking Kevin Durant and Jack Dorsey sitting around like a bunch of fucking assholes, pretending they have anything in common, other than wealth and a bottomless desire to be “cool.”

I think they’ve got a point. There really was a market gap in my life for a guy who so successfully represented a basketball brand that amounted to “Oversensitive Frontrunning Dipshit”.

The thing about being great at basketball is that it doesn’t prevent a person from being boring and deeply unpleasant.

The Warriors blew a 3-1 series lead. 

Totally missed the opportunity to rearrange the letters into ANAL TIN POT.

Yes, and who better to teach Cole lessons about cheap shots being unacceptable than Tom Wilson. 

Somehow in a town that is home (at least part time) to Andrew Cuomo, News Corp, the Steinbrenners, the Wilpons, and Donald Trump, James Dolan manages to be the biggest pissbaby on the block. It’s truly remarkable.

Seems like he’s easily triggered.

Typical keyboard warrior

Dana White looks like Ryan Reynolds having an allergic reaction to a bee sting.

I mean he got beat and made an obvious foul to prevent a shot. I think we’ve all played with the old guy in the gym who does this. It just so happens that this old guy in an NBA rookie.