Somewhere the Buffalo fanatic who actually bet for the team is shedding tears of absolute joy while writing up their resignation letter. Probably didn’t win enough money to do that, but why let such facts ruin a perfect moment.

In an astonishing display of restraint, here’s nine-months-pregnant Hilary Duff politely asking her stalker, whom she addresses as “sir” while he is idling in a residential driveway next to her car, to please stop following her to her son’s soccer game, her errand runs, and her sister’s house.

Albert makes an incredibly salient point - ALL of these assholes have the stupidest fucking haircuts. I think it’s a testament to the fact that they have no one in their lives that really loves them; no one will look them in the eye and tell them, from the heart, “you look like you enjoy yelling at high school…

Three electricity puns on 9/17/18. Pretty good output Faraday’s work.

/me calls CPS about a 12-year-old drinking beer.

I half-expected him to say that he kept showing up to the OTHER American Airlines arena in Miami and that’s why he missed all of this.

Filed under “There is no such thing as a ‘good’ billionaire”

There’s a kind of boundary blurring that happens a lot on college campuses where students/interns/athletes end up doing side-work like babysitting, house-painting or whatever for their professors/supervisors/coaches. I get on one hand how this could be doing the students a favor, but the relationships are so inherently…

I have a feeling that these fine upstanding gentlemen are not entirely unfamiliar with what to do with items of value that just happen to have fallen off the back of a truck.

These details are upsetting. It’s hard to read about incidents taking place in college athletics that you’d usually associate with a Supreme Court nomination.  

This is really going to complicate his supreme court confirmation hearing in 2052.

Ohm not following.

Well, I mean, he covers it in Thursday’s power unit messages, so.

It’s not uncommon for me to send a text message out on a Friday or Saturday night that says, ‘Remember, Title IX equals respect.’”

I picture him walking into the press conference with a plate of crab legs in one hand and a beautiful woman on the other arm. Eats the crab leg... “Didn’t have to steal these.” Looks at the woman... “Didn’t have to r...”

You can’t “steal” a QBing job. You win it through hard work. It’s not like it’s a crab leg.

He looks like Conor McGregor at the press conference where he states that his management team has embezzled millions of dollars from him. 

Nice to see a Harvard kid finally get a shot.

He looks like Conor McGregor after a month at sea.

Nice of the team to let Homeless Conor McGregor answer some questions.