How does losing your virginity on Bachelor/ette in Paradise compare to just the regular version? 

I guess if Ricky ends up hurt we can call this a case of broken Seals, amirite

Ahh that makes more sense! Thanks 

Why does deGrom want to stay a Met? 

venture capital, most publicly the Chernin Group and Providence Equity. It’s also not like they’re throwing huge salary dollars around.

With great content like... uh, reminders about Bank of America’s earnings report, it’s only a matter of time before there’s a Barstool dot com terminal in every financial services office in the country.  

Ahh yes, can’t go wrong with the ol’ Georgi Markov Type 2. It’s lightweight, with a burnished wood handle, aluminium ribbing, and a secure latch closure. The favored umbrella of KGB staffers for decades!

Ivanka and Don Jr. are going to end up as lightsaber-wielding #Resistance heroes and i’m absolutely livid

Who needs a Kentucky Colonelcy when you can be an Admiral in the Space Force. 

I’m willing to let Il Papa’s wild racism slide, but only if he wears the Colonel outfit out in public from now on.

This instantly reminded me of Derrick Rose’s testimony too, just so absurdly wrong it is hard to believe.  

Starting to think this McCoy guy might be bad news. 

Qatari stadiums will have just the je ne sais quois my instagram profile needs, plus i certainly dont plan on watching soccer surrounded by uncultured americans. half of them have never even spent a semester abroad!

It’s like dropbox sponsored skeletor out there 

What’s up with the package, Steve?

Life being worse than fiction, Isner’s also definitely going to invite Trump to the final, so at least we’ll have a large protest balloon overhead to talk about.

I feel like no one has addressed the obvious: Anderson’s hat looks ridiculous.

Sure, Papa John can bring some pizzas, but god help him if Roger Goodell catches anyone snacking before the PR crisis ends.

Amazing to me that Il Papa decided his best defense was literally “whatabout COL Sanders?!?” 

The Perkins Coie bit is my favorite. Biglaw rivalries: definitely a key issue for most Americans!