OMG THIS ALSO HAPPENED! THIS ALSO HAPPENED!

That was perfection and I <3 Mutti and Fatti!

CURRENT TEMPERATURE IN HELL:

I know the whole Uncle Joe thing is supposed to be cute and funny but I would not be able to handle this at all. Keep your fucking hands off me and your hot breath out of my ear. PERIOD! Also, step back 3 paces. I don't give a fuck if you are the Vice President of the United Fucking States.

SO much easier to be like that when they're dead though.

"Ok, the material is kinda scarce but I can work with it. Massage her thigh gently - I SAID GENTLY MOTHERFUCKER, WHAT IS SHE DOUGH??? - and leave a trail of butterfly kisses up her neck. Ugh that's more like creepy-crawlies, were you raised in a barn? Lady don't let him do all the work, move your hands up his back, NO…

Jason,

Yeah for real. Hippos in general are violent and dangerous, and they represented a significant threat to people living along the Nile.

AND WHERE ARE THEY NOW? GONE. BECAUSE THEY DIDN'T RIDE HIPPOS.

All hail Bird Jesus.

How do you wish us to honour your memories?

Um.

i am full out crying, cam's joke was necessary and fabulous. this poem is a scream into the ether that cis men refuse hear or acknowledge and this is fabulous and THANK YOU for sharing this.

A more accurate image would be strawberry jam:

Regarding periods, this is fantastic, and everyone should watch it:

Disagree. The cattiness has nothing to do with her beliefs and everything to do with an explanation of her show that features a line like "And then I was on top of the lion and a guy, a random guy, just looked on me with a headset that I've never communicated with before..."

These comments man…are you fucking kidding me? NO ONE deserves this. It's pathetic that people think this is ok. Dissapointed.

If he was upset over just having dinner, you dodged a bullet. Guy sounds shady as hell.

Good evening, Jezzies! I hope everyone is having a great weekend.

Yes. He is the person who deserves our sympathy here.