It's obviously a joke, but something being "a joke" doesn't mean it's not harmful.

Some corrupt charity?

You're just saying that so no one will suspect the bearnado you're planning.

Mark, I think I would rather take my chances having my face on fire than drink a Bud Light, but to each his own.

Team audience. Show up and act like a professional.

One day I was sitting on the bus behind a girl with headphones on with a guy started calling her "Blondie," and just generally telling her how he'd like to get to know her. He wasn't particularly crude about it, but it was clear his attention was unwelcome. But he kept trying, and she kept replying in monosyllables…

"Let he who is without sin cast the first stone at that lovely ass."

Nope. That's at my fine establishment, The Pork Sword.

Wow, as if he couldn't get any more desirable, he doesn't change diapers! *swoon* Just what every woman is looking for in a father amirite ladies?

Why can't you grow a brain?

I'm about to blow your mind: some women like short hair...and they like to *gasp* keep it that way!! LIKE MEN! *clutches pearls*

IDGAF !

Here Is A Picture Of Two People I Don't Care About But I Commented Anyway Because People Need to Know Who I Do Not Care About.

Thank you for telling me

SURPRISE

"Poke from George W. Bush. Again. Ausgezeichnet."

going on an OKC first date tonight.....please send positive vibes lol....took a break from it for a couple of weeks.....

You guys! I just got engaged! He proposed in the noodles aisle of the grocery store, everyone was confused as to why we were so excited/happy/kissing. There was no kneeling (thank God!), only happy questions and smiling. Last night he asked my parents if they were cool with him proposing and I guess he had been…