Either it’ll be the worst scandal in U.S. history, or it’ll be the death of the republic and the rise of a new order.

Yeah, the bottle of Squirt sells me that this guy isn’t a complete buffoon. It’s the caviar of inexpensive sodas.

Yeah but you still got most of a bottle of Squirt to comfort you.

Bar napkins work just fine as a coaster and not the fancy ones with the ridges. Just sprinkle some salt on the napkin and your beer won’t stick to it.

Then I got hammered the next day and forgot to put it away. Ice Cream cakes are bad.

Got hammered once and woke up with this in my freezer.

There are few experiences in life that compare to eating a slice of ice cream cake and saving the middle fudge layer until the end. So good.

I think Manafort flipped. Could be both.

To me, it reads like a guy who got a phone call telling him exactly what will happen to his family if he helps the FBI get the information they are looking for while he was in the middle of trying to figure out how he’s going to stay out of federal prison.

I remember reading an article about him playing high school baseball and everybody hating him because he was a pompous jagoff.

I had a friend in high school named Faith Meadows, full name Faith Sureis Harmony Inprairie Meadows. You may be unsurprised to learn she was born in a commune.

My dad worked with a guy named Chip Monk. I went to college with a guy named Bob Evans (he said it’s been a family name for generations. No relation to the breakfast food).

(looks around at people in attendance for early afternoon game) DON’T YOU PEOPLE HAVE JOBS?

Also, twins Adam and Eve.

Yeah, I’m really confused about this one. What did people think Last Resort was about? It is extremely clear throughout the entire song. The song is entirely angry and depressed, even if you don’t listen to the lyrics (which explicitly talk about suicide and self harm). It’s not like these faux-romantic songs where I…

Even before then you get:

How about the couple at my church that used Billy Idol’s White Wedding?

I think that the majority of people don’t listen to or care about the lyrics of songs past the chorus. It’s why you get a song like “Pumped Up Kicks” playing on supermarket speakers, or “Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life)“ as a graduation staple.

Yeah yeah, and that Semisonic song Closing Time isn’t about last second hook ups when the bar is closing.