Tennis players - the kids at the yacht club too spicy for the sailing team

I suppose if they wore helmets in tennis he would have thrown his, glorious hair whipping in the wind, exploding with anger as he charged the net

Man, if someone did that to me on a tennis court I’d definitely throw my New Balances at him.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s impressive. I’d hate to see what I’d do at the plate against even low A talent. I’m guessing a solid .000/.000/.000 line.

Yeah, Jordan sucked at baseball too. But he was good at basketball. Really good, actually.

“What are you DOING? No! Nooooo!”

In related news, Tebow finally made contact with someone else’s genitals.

... although he was kind enough to sign the ball for Brustman

A shakedown. Rattle the NK cage, and charge Seoul out the nose for THAAD.

Billionaires—they’re just like us!

Fuck that. He’s worth $29 billion? Maybe that’s how we’re supposed to move our arms.

At first glance I read his shirt as “I taste everything.” That shirt would probably fit better.

My net worth is that I sometimes make grilled peanut butter and jam sandwiches.

My first guess was cocaine

I know we are supposed to hate Bill Simmons here but his podcast with Ballmer is incredible. That guy is insane but also pretty awesome. His mannerisms are basically an extension of this GIF.

You could have just left it at “my team is the Warriors.”

You’d think with that much money he could pay someone to teach him how to move his arms like a real person.

I wish they wouldn’t do close ups of his face like that. Why humiliate a guy when he’s injured? No one wants to see themselves in that state.

This is the least corrupt league Gronk has ever participated in.

I’ll give you a star once they know what’s wrong with him.