It’s great that Christian Hackenberg gets to be a second round bust in two leagues. 

The rules link also helped me remember some Coach Guys:

Papa “John” is the gift that keeps on giving. Gotta be the winner.

I can’t wait until Stan Kroenke’s massive Inglewood stadium opens and is treated like a dormant volcano by the locals.

And let’s not forget how bad the attendance numbers look once you account for the fact that Philip Rivers’ family is responsible for filling half of the seats.

I remember once, my kickboxing instructor took me to a bar, and made me dance with another man’s girlfriend. Well, he obviously did not take kindly to it, and I dance-fought with him and all his buddies. Was it a good idea? Certainly not. Did I learn a valuable lesson?

Dear Baker,

DEAR BAKER,

Truth is that Winnipeg had to build the stadium because the Blue Bombers threatened to move to Arizona.

The emails are terrible entitled assholes. Scroll down to the tweets and they get better.

I’m three stories in, and we’ve got one guy who quit because he got caught trying to steal from his business, one guy who quit because he didn’t want to fix his mistake, and one guy who quit because he wasn’t following the dress code. Should I read on, or are they all entitled assholes?

This guy’s insecurity and the insecurity of his pitiful disciples would be amusing if our wells were not already poisoned by widespread aggressive ignorance. Everyone involved with Barstool is a net negative to society. There’s really not much else to say on the matter. I applaud those who call these people out for…

Unfortunately that just isn’t the case. I have worked at both Target and Home Depot. Home Depot was much worse. I have also worked at McDonald’s, Wendy’s, Applebees, GAP, Bed Bath & Beyond, Best Buy, and Circuit City back when that was around. I worked at Lowe’s one summer too. Home Depot wasn’t just worse than all of…

Britt is spending a lot of time getting ethered on social media recently

how ever will an attractive white woman land on her feet? This is damn near a death sentence.

Nearly everything in this world is fucking shit, but one of the few things that gives me hope on a daily basis is that we live in a world where A-Rod has entered an astounding and much-loved second career in his post-playing life and Jeets is flailing and insulting Bryant fucking Gumbel on national TV.

More stars. I thank you for your work.

Shouldn’t the Marlins play ‘God Save the Queen’ instead of the National Anthem before every game?

You’d think with all of the unspoken rules in baseball, surely one would be ‘you should have your corporate headquarters in the municipality that you’ve cheated out of resources for years and years.’

God bless Marlins Man and his cohort for doing the thing every Marlins fan wanted to do but couldn’t.