You are about to be nuked by Ghandi. Would you like to buy a shield that will protect your empire for 5 turns for $4.99?

The trick is that he told him he was signing a boxing contract.

Even though it’s a remake of religious Christmas song, the David Bowie/Bing Crosby version of Little Drummer Boy is pretty epic, especially when Bowie breaks into the counter melody during the chorus “peace on earth, can it be...”

That part at the end is what sends me over the edge too. That woman has every right to turn the hose on that little shit.

And of course her name is Scout, too (you see it when she virtually “signs” her friend’s cast).

That ad really pisses me off. Don’t pretend you don’t know what a computer is, you little fucker!

That Apple iPad girl? She’s lying. She knows what a computer is. Don’t play dumb with me, little girl. Typing away on an iPad in a Brooklyn backyard is sucky and you know it. Get a real laptop.

I get my napping abilities from my dad, I can literally feel his body language as I fall asleep with my arms crossed over my chest the faint sound of my own snoring as I drift off. I don’t think it’s a gender thing, just a genetics thing.

But bed naps you either have to set your alarm or will yourself out of bed after an hour or so. Otherwise you are gone for at least 2 hours and wake up and have no idea where the hell you are. Very disorienting, especially if it went from daylight to night time during your nap.

1 happened to me in college. I fell asleep on the couch reading Lord of the Rings (“Fellowship,” obviously, probably a Tom Bombadil section) at around 4:15p and woke up in total darkness. I semi-panicked, wondered if the power was out, what time it was, where my roommates were, and if the apocalypse and/or our…

I saw that Trump version of this video that’s going around and got the song stuck in my head. Love this song.

Well, I’d love for it to be Mexico that gets through.

“Alexa, initiate sexual harassment mode”

I wish I had an automatic lock button in my office.
I’d use it to keep people out, though.

Posting while drunk is never a good idea. The correct order is:

False. Cookie dough is better than cookies, because people can fuck up cookies and burn them. But cookie dough.... it is perfect as-is.

You better have made the noise. Kelsey Grammer’s finest contribution to civilization after making us aware of David Hyde Pierce.

And that, kids, is the story of Jim Tomsula’s Best Thanksgiving Dessert Ever.

A BGE will set you back $1000 for a large with a stand and side tables. You will get $100000000000000 of meat smoking enjoyment out of it, so it’s a good return on investment. I used to be pretty good with the Weber kettle, but when I upgraded to the Egg, it changed my world. Like, there were little angels circling…