OMG. Totally just snort laughed. Thank you. I can go to bed happy now.

Yes! Nurses scare me and make me fear for my life and the life of my loved ones. This article basically sums up my fears

I meant Dancing in the Moonlight is my personal favorite. It makes me feel like I’m dancing in a some hot sweaty sticky dive bar - a sexy one!

This is a very gentle, amusing hoax that hurt no one and I congratulate them both.

Sucks for parents who can’t find evening sitters.

Seriously. I hear commercials on the radio advertising hospitals... “Listen, we’re not saying if you go to a different hospital, you’ll die... but we’re not not saying that, either...”

TRUTH.

Bostonians have a natural propensity for punching strangers in the face, so it's probably not an exaggeration.

Why do we live in a world with Fuller House but no Buffy reboot? :,(

For real, I know it’s ‘cause Joss Whedon is busy with other stuff, and so much of that has been amazing, but it still makes me sad.

That was unnecessary and kind of mean.

Maybe I am a terrible person, because I still finds this hilarious.

What does any of this have to do with a date? They weren’t on a date. She is a professional journalist interviewing a musician so this seems off topic.

Meanwhile, IRL:

Toonces, the Cat Who Could Select a Playlist

you need to alpha up your beta game

ALL FEMALES CHEAT. That’s a FACT.

Hey Kirk, remember when I was laying odds on how quick we were gonna get this comment?

Oh god, I had to read this about 4 times before I realized that the IRS agent was making the dispensary owner pay off the IRS agent’s student loans. I was reading it that the IRS agent made the dispensary owner pay off his own student loans, and I could not, for the life of me, figure out why he would care.

I feel like he only dates those super young chickies to console himself that the woman he really wants, Rihanna, will never truly be his.