I will gladly drop acid and take a swim in a sensory deprivation tank to travel to a parallel Earth with tears in the fabric of reality threatening my daily existence if it means not experiencing this 2016 election.

Meanwhile, Gary Johnson - Goofus to Bill Weld’s Gallant - admitted to himself what everyone in this universe, the Walternate universe, Earth Two, Earth 616, and every other version of our existence has known for forever...

Johnson: “And what is Aleppo?”

Will Sasso as Kenny Rogers is more electable.

Does anyone have any statistics on who is voting for Johnson? Are they normally republicans or conservatives? Are some of them on the left? I am curious to know how much if any of those voters are “liberals”.

“Johnson holds a series of ideologically incoherent positions”

And despite all this, they’re still paying their players more than the NFL’s minor league system.

So you pretended to cover the Braves for the press for a year, so what? Craig Wilson pretended to play for the Braves for a year month and change.

How many of those people have a ‘Calvin pissing on something’ sticker on their truck’s back window/tailgate? How many would ever see the irony in that?

bah male or female its just adorable.

Did people have this trouble with Braixen too? She’s basically the Pokemon version of an anime magical-girl, wand and skirt and all.

Oooh. That I can see. Rory ends up with Kirk, obviously.

I blame scary clowns, and Stephen King.

And I looked and beheld a pale man, with skin like the belly of a slug. In his right hand he held a machete, and in his left hand he held the decapitated head of a cheetah from a game reserve in Africa. And lo, his name was Eric.

Does Eric have some sort of facial paralysis? Every picture of him, all I can think of is this:

He looks like Pestilence, the 1st of the Four Horseman.

Has Trump said anything about Michelle at all? I would be really surprised if he decided to target her specifically (uh, people love her), which may be why she feels comfortable speaking out so strongly against him. Of course, she also probably couldn’t care less about what he says, so there’s also that.