Why does the Alien Bro look like Robert Smith and Edward Twilight got caught in a transporter accident?

I love Azzarello’s writing, but oof, that was a weird thing to say. I’m sure he thought it was clever, but it was a swing and a miss, and it sounds like something a suit in promotion came up with.

It’s crazy that the only union that it seems the fascists want are police unions.

“Sir, will you tell us, once and for all, did you release weaponized ticks on America.”
“You know what...yes. Yes, we did that.”
“Oh. OK, here’s a trillion dollars.”

You know how they have a Designated Survivor for the SOTU in case something terrible happens to all of the line of succession?*

They need a Designated Person Who Always Jumps Out As 45th Is Rounding A Corner And Yells AHHHHHHHHHHHH!

*and yes, I am basing this off of the TV show, I don’t even know if it’s a real thing,…

Dude’s absolutely getting workman’s comp for his injuries, isn’t he? Despite not being on duty when he got hit. They’ll figure out a way. 

Seriously, someone needs to investigate Dana White, the UFC, and weight cutting in general. This isn’t the first time I’ve seen people trying to cut weight looking like this, and I’ve heard a lot of horror stories about the process of doing so. It’s insane. I have to assume the same thing may happen in boxing, but it…

And remember, this is not about freedom of speech on the Republican side. Freedom of speech and political neutrality is not what they’re interested in.They want a freedom of consequence for the shitty things they say. If put on the other side of it, they would be more than happy to ban liberals from being able to say…

Oh, also, the fact that he decided to make a show and check the arm he used after clubbing Williams on the head, because OW THAT HURT ME, THE PERSON YOU SHOULD BE CONCERNED ABOUT!

Fuck that squinty faced asshole.

The best part is that he missed both of his free throws before he did that.

Gizmodo, is there any way to get your new hedge fund overlords to implement a block feature, please? How much would the subscription be to get that already?

I really want that I Love You 3000 shirt.

4/10, face isn’t small enough.

That would mean there’s a literal paper trail, and this isn’t the reality where we’d be that lucky they all still exist.

The yearly investment is definitely a turn off, but, with a lot of yearly service fees, it’s kinda nice to not have to worry when the monthly fee is coming up on something when you love paycheck to paycheck. As long as you’re aware of when it renews and didn’t catch you by surprise with a $200 bill.

I still have (had?) MoviePass, and honestly, it’s paid for itself with the amount of times I saw movies in the last few months. Saw Far From Home on Tuesday, and now I’m glad I got it in under the deadline. Was hoping to go see Midsommar this weekend, but that’s out of the picture.

Or see the treads as it crushes you. (2021 Edition)

The fact that lightning did not strike and kill hundreds of these goons, including our Ghoul President, is all the evidence you need that there is no God. I mean, all of the elements were there for the most ironic sendoff ever. Full stop, change my mind.

2 things:

I wish I could body this asshole in the worse, worse possible way.