When my great aunt was sick, she stayed with us for a while. Every time she had a bad coughing fit, I would make sure to come check and her, grab her a water, and punch her in the face a couple times. She couldn’t shake the illness and passed, but I am sure she would have thanked me for checking on her so often if…

I was not driving 120, officer. My two companions and I were driving 40 mph apiece.

Say what you want about murderers, at least Hernandez put in the goddamn time and effort. Not even being in prison could stop his dedication to his craft.

Hot take: Shove taking place within the context of a basketball play where the shover gets called for a foul for said act, is fine. Shove taking place after the whistle, where the shover gets a running start to exact revenge for a harder than necessary foul that was already penalized within the rules of the game, is…

Yea, I’d like to get more information on this as well.

This may be insensitive, but Savage Garden?

Go back to your safe space. A muderer is dead. Take comfort knowing he died doing what he loved.

I would argue that him being a bad guy does indeed make this less sad.

Still a danger because Rove has what are unquestionably boobs

Fox News is exactly like Donald Trump.

I personally think Joe Namath would be unqualified—and his appearance questionable—even if the show had been called Late 60's and Early 70's Very Good NFL QB Specialists.

Have you ever been in a men’s bathroom at an arena? It is not place for women. I say this with genuine concern for the mental and physical health of women everywhere.

That’s because when men use a public restroom, they take care of their business and leave. Women try to chair a meeting of the UN Security Council.

“Why are you dodging that home run ball? He couldn’t hit an elephant at this dist-”

but he is chiefly famous for his speed records.

I can’t watch the commercial here at work with sound, so maybe I’m missing something. But did they change the product at all? Doesn’t seem like it, from what I’m reading. So what’s the problem? Or have they completely abandoned advertising for black women with kinky hair? I just feel like I’m missing something…

This strikes me as insane.  

This is the worst take. And I’m pretty sure those first few were Eastern European fascists in the 1930's.

Thanks, you just caused the debutaunte whom I'm escourting to the Derby to faint.