to bae.

This is awesome and I’m so fucking excited to see her stand there and light shit on fire. Seriously, the amount of courage this is taking is insane. I hope she receives unending support from the people around her.

Who are you and what have you done with the real Fahey? First the beard, now the glasses? What’s next? Clothes? Haircut? Actually start going to work in Gawker offices?

OK. So here’s an embarrassing yoga-hockey celeb story the DS peeps should appreciate. I live in Toronto and was taking yoga classes at a studio down the street from my house. Classes were very small, like 6 people not including the instructor. About halfway through the sessions, the instructor’s sister starts coming…

Ed note: Tommy did not meet his deadline.

Someone emailed me to ask if my nose was still broken.

i still don’t know

I’ve experienced a lot of mansplaining about what constitutes a ball.

if ur pushin 40 u should talk to women my pal

Who had the best sincerely confused “ACTUALLY” reply?

Could you please help all of us Deadspin commenters learn how to talk to girls? Most of us are pushing 40, it’s time to give it a try.

You’d better believe it.

I agree with these guys. Not all of us straight guys want to have sex with the Rock. Some of us just want to spend the night cuddling on the couch with him, watching Fried Green Tomatoes, affectionately feeding each other popcorn. So maybe you do need to meet more straight guys.

Also you said butt sex, which: nice.

I tried, oh how I tried, but Alcatraz security just put me back on the ferry.

I feel like I can’t compete with the writer’s story, but for me it was a period/virus combo. I had clots the size of guinea pigs dropping out of my vagina as I sat shaking on the toilet shitting my brains out while throwing up into a trashcan.

Given birth.