The Nobel laureates on Chicago sports radio will be lamenting how a Thibs coached team would NEVER have given up 147 points in a game.

The countdown to the letter to the editor about how Luke Kuechly wouldn’t do this has officially begun.

Whoooooooosh

Zoooooooom

Roses are red

Are you my girlfriend?

Welcome to the Philadelphia 76ers, Ben! You’re right leg is now broken and your left ACL has exploded. If you’ll just step into this jar of amber liquid, we’ll store you here in this closet with our other big time future talents. Remember, the 2023 title is the only important one. Now breathe the liquid into your…

Sorry for my bludger.

Well, if the Cowboys cut Hardy he can always try his hand at Quidditch. There’s a sport that really needs beaters.

Amen!

You’re a fucking idiot.

Yeah. the toilet.