I really hope idiots like you don’t breed. If you do, you are raising the most boring, safe, humorless douchebag that will get destroyed in school by other kids that didn’t have an overprotective witch for a *mother.

Spoken as someone who loves cats, this is ridiculous. Cats ambush each other all the time out of playfulness, and their standard ‘holy shit’-response is to leap into the air. Hell, when my oldest cat was young he was lonely, so I sometimes hid behind corners just to play with him. Today he is the safest, most…

so is it ok if I leave a cucumber where I eat to keep the damn cat off the table?