Trump can barely handle a ramp, never mind stairs.

Donald Trump Jr tweeted that this is not who we are! Which is about as rich as Rubio and Cruz’s calls for decorum and civility.

I’m actually kind of grateful for her. Thanks to Kelly, I know what a carpet bagger sounds like... “y’all”.

I heard a British comic talk on a panel show about how much he enjoyed the media whiplash around Meghan and Harry.

I got a decision letter from unemployment today saying that they’re rejiggering my Pandemic Unemployment Assistance in the new year based on last year’s income. Since I didn’t make as much last year, my PUA is going to be reduced.

Amen, it’s time we stop dallying with euphemistic language and call racist bitches out for being racist bitches. And racist assholes, racist fuckers, racist white trash... and I admit the latter can be seen as redundant, but not always.

Nah, you’re a monster, lady. That was your whole ass you showed in that video. It’s sweet of you to go through the motions, but let’s be real.

“We can’t defund the police! We need them to protect us from crime and bombers and terrorists!”

Malcolm Gladwell: It’s just masturbation! What’s so wrong with masturbating in front of a captive audience!

There really is something rich in the people in power urging patience from the people who are suffering from whatever they need help with.

And then, if there are delays getting it out due to, I dunno, some sort of lack of planning, they can blame the FDA dragging their feet and Sleepy Joe just not being able to handle the job, unlike the stale Cheetoh in Chief.

“And unfortunately the bad news is.... someone will win.” — Barry Crimmins

Yes, but if he smiled, there’d be a real chance that it would always be winter... and never Christmas!

That’s not a loophole, that’s a tunnel! With all the presumed engineering required to build it.

Only if Kim Jong Un let’s Trump borrow it.

I heard a reporter talking about how she interviewed Mark Zuckerburg a couple years ago and when asked about Holocaust deniers, he said he thought “they didn’t mean to lie.” Which is not, in fact the case.

Michael Jordan’s net worth is $1.6 BILLION dollars. It’s not Bezos money, no but.... y’know what, Mike? You could do some great things with that cash. Just saying.

No wonder he admires Donald Trump, then.

*wiping a tear from my eye* He just... he just loves the military so much....

I mean, really the galling thing is that he’s not even that good of a swimmer!