Shorter you:

Right? So what if he didn’t stand for the anthem of a country that he feels doesn’t respect him or those that look like him? How else would you create change in the world without a brave man like Mike Pence, who literally saved the world from nuclear annihilation with a look, taking a knee for things he believes in?

Hello mother. Last time I checked, the games are in SK.

This is a perfect burn except for the technical flaw that they probably don’t actually fuck.

No, he also has obsequious adoring gaze.

Same. If you can’t admit that someone is objectively beautiful, you have some issues to confront.

North and South Korea(who are our allies, btw) are a unified delegation for the Olympics. Maybe being the bigger man and standing for our allies should mean more than trying to stick to ole’ Un, no?

Not into guys but even I know Tongan dude is hot as fuck.

He was scared that if he stood up, everyone would see the raging boner so he sat still in his seat.

“Try harder.” That’s what he said. 

<Not funny Mike Pence gay penis joke>

Pence probably didn’t stand because he didn’t want mother to see the huge boner he got after watching the shirtless bobsledder from Tongo march into the stadium.

He may not have stood for the North Koreans but he was sure to give them a stony glare from where he was so they could see the resolve of the American people. Or whatever bullshit it was that he spouted when he visited the DMZ. What an ass hat.

Alternatively, he had a raging boner from looking at the Tongan dude.

Fuck that literal mother fucker

I can read between the lines to make my own determination, but how exactly do you FEEL about homosexuality? Do those meanies on the left make you FEEL BAD about your BAD FEELINGS about gay people? Well, boo fucking hoo, buddy. It’s obvious that what you don’t understand about this would take me too long to explain,…

Prettttty sure no one ever said people aren’t allowed to be uncomfortable with other people’s life choices. Way to ignore everything the LGBTQ community has been fighting against.

The left opposes being so uncomfortable with gay people that you want to see them be psychologically tortured until they’ve been convinced they’re not gay anymore because that is Bad, Actually.

This is a good point and I 100% agree with you. However, I think it’s fair tos speculate as to why he’s so afraid of sexuality in general. Won’t be alone with a woman who is not his wife. Is bigoted toward homosexuals. I’m being dead serious when I say I think he was probably molested as a child (he is catholic,…

Yeah, this “every homophobe must be gay” thing is getting tiring. I get that it has some baring in fact, but there are plenty of straight people that are just hateful. Also, I get that the idea is dunking on him for being a hypocrite, but the setups sure seem to be close to jokes where the punchline is being gay, not…