This article is pretty strange to read on Jezebel, honestly. The tone, the weird framing (the statement that the report just repeats allegations that the Democrats made during the campaign- What??), but particularly the underlying completely dishonest statement that the intelligence agencies have provided no evidence.…

Wow. This is a total garbage article. Jezebel really needs to rethink its political reporting- really, really not good. Let’s look at the NYTimes. Oh look. Literally the second bullet point front page main points of the article without even clicking on the article itself:

You know racism’s gotten bad when male cheerleaders think they have the right to make fun of anyone else.

I’m sorry, but who among us would not fuck Harrison Ford, especially Han Solo-Harrison Ford? It is for this reason (as well as murder Hitler when he was just a shitty art student, and someone else I won’t mention in case the Feds are watching) I would build a fucking time machine. To fuck Han Solo/Raiders of the Lost…

That’s just the Corporate America they’re scared of. God knows it has been responsible for waaay more evil than anyone wearing a pentagram ever has.

People freak out more when you’re dressed like Corporate America but sporting a pentagram, in my experience. A lot of people couldn’t reconcile “pastel cardigan and silk skirt” with “satan, maybe?”

Yeah, maybe they’re just trying to teach their kids that it’s rude to pet strangers? For this, I thank them.

“I’ve grown used to moms on the subway pulling their children away when they try and pet the velvet cloak I often wear to my job…. Kids seem to know witches are safe and cool. They feel our loving energies.”

umm isn’t this what body painters do? how is this at all like “the dress”? which was fucking gold and white.

I forgot; who is running for president in 2016?

The best comment on her divorce from Cruise was to David Letterman: “Well, I can wear heels now.”

I have not had sex in months and I do not wear crocks.

Former veterinary nurse here. I obviously know about dogs overheating in cars, but I question this. You can’t just smash the window, you also have to get the dog out of there and cooled down. I’ve seen really experienced animal nurses be mauled to hell when trying to help a distressed animal. Breaking the window in a…

I try not to let it bother me that Liz Lemon & Leslie Knope would probably clock in at a sold three bills in reality.

Botox isn’t just cosmetic. It’s used to manage spasticity, migraines and incontinence among other things.

Proooooobably should have known the answer to this even without an intelligence briefing.

Katmandidn’t

I dunno, I feel like for a long while Beyonce was an “acceptable” black and then this album came out and people realized that she viewed herself as a genuine black woman. Apparently that was just too much for them.

“This push for women to go topless in the 21st century is as strong as women wanting to vote in the 20th century,”

I don't feel like cunt is a strong enough word.