So not my best opening comment ever then? Gimme a mulligan on this one and I’ll try again later

Haha, well then maybe I should just retire. I don’t look that good in grey anyhow.

I think I may start commenting here on Jez with Gawker gone, but I’m worried I’m not “woke” enough. How woke must I be on a scale of 1-10, 10 being maximum wokeness?

Oooh yeah, order me around please. I like all these rules.....

The best Kinja deal has to be ALL OF KINJA for $135 million, right?

The best Kinja deal has to be ALL OF KINJA for $135 million, right?

What is the best food/dipping sauce combo?

How many have you been to? I go two or three times a year, three days each time, and haven’t seen a horse death since 2008. I think you just had bad luck

Yep, we’re supposed to have all 12 there this year for the first time in a long time, but inevitably somebody is gonna call at the last minute and say they had to work over, or the baby has worms or something. There’s always something.

I don’t blame Tom for this at all. As a Brady, he knows all too well the dangers of a hard football.

They didn’t have any videos featuring their butts, so I’m withholding judgement for now.

At a restaurant or at a bar? At restaurants I can see that, because I get incredibly thirsty & shitty light beers are good for that. At a bar, when you have nothing to worry about but flavor (& getting drunk) I would question whether or not those people were even born with taste buds.

I liked the shirt, and I don't even have kids yet. I'm doomed. Destined for a life of total dorkdom.

Had an ex that always wanted to do it and I hated it. One of you is always mostly out of the stream of water, and so one of you is always chilly. No thanks.

I find it shocking that WV's isn't a Jerry West Lakers jersey. I've seen hundreds over the years, never seen the Brewers one they listed.

God that sounds delicious and makes me want to take an extra blood pressure pill immediately.

1. Bells Best Brown Ale

I like Red Stripe, but it's a very plain beer for the price. I can never justify buying it, even though it is slightly better than the main macro lagers here.

They have gotten gimmicky as hell (Beard Beer? Are you fucking kidding me?) but they make some really good stuff too. In my opinion they make one of the best brown ales out there, second only to Bell's Best Brown.

Did he ever fucking apologize for stomping a defenseless human in the stomach?

Sit on it Morried