He’s never been IN the black either.

My excuse for everything from now on:

I heard he was on that lean.

Serves him right for pulling his business from Sterling Cooper

Where does this madness end? It’s frankly ridiculous to insert asparagus into the story of a cosmic Jewish zombie who was his own father and can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is…

Having to make pleasantries with Jim Nantz for the rest of your life can be considered a form of death, yes.

So Tony Romo is dying and that’s why this is happening?

First the SJWs came for the strength & conditioning coaches, and I said nothing, because I could get my own protein powder at GNC...

Rumor has it the cheerleaders were also part of a pyramid scheme.

Crazy, Sportscenter predicted this moment years ago!

muy grave el recto

“Smiling and laughing”...in a Whole Foods? 

Oh, say can you see that they should get a room.

BUT I HAVE THE RIGHT TO PROTEST! IT IS GUARANTEED UNDER THE CONSTITUTION THAT MY ANCESTORS FOUGHT AND DIED TO SECEDE FROM!

Any sober-minded politician.

His name is Jason Pierre Paw.

Exactly as MLK warned us about in “Letter from A Birmingham Jail”: “I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro’s great stumbling block in his stride toward freedom is not the White Citizen’s Counciler or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate, who is more devoted to ‘order’ than to justice;…

This is all very unfair to poor Sage Steele. She makes it clear it’s not herself she’s worried about—it’s all the OTHER flyers (some of them immigrants too, by golly by gum!) who were being inconvenienced for whom Sage Steele’s heart wept. And all because some untidy and obstreperous liberals got a little upset about…

Here is the church.

First Responder: Stay still, sir. I’m going to ask you a few questions.